Ass! Shade! Tears! Revelations! Headlocks! My dear’s this episode of Drag Race had all of the makings of a 19th Century novella, but with more twists & turns & putdowns. I could see the screenplay written by Edith Wharton & Jacqueline Susann.
Well, let’s get ready to rumble! Onward to the bullet points!
- Okay how appropriate to do a challenge based on padding! Like last season’s infamous duct tape challenge this was hilarious and appropriate.
- Sharon Needles is very quickly becoming a favorite. From her laugh out loud quote “When making your ass, always draw the shape of Africa, or as Latrice would say ‘The Homeland,'” to her awesome assessments of Jiggly, to her boyfriend Alaska, she is becoming not only one to watch and root for but one who just might win this damn thing. Plus she had the best quote of the night – “We’re selfish, vain creatures of beauty and isn’t it bizarre how we make the best friends in the world?”
- Also joining the favorite list, Chad Michaels. Not only is she professional as heck, but her maternal instincts kicked into overtime this episode; from scolding Madame LaQueer about her ankle, to her harrowing tales about her silicone misadventures, she was amazing.
- Props also to Ru this season. Her workroom critiques were pretty amazing and spot on!
- As for the teams – Phi Phi’s team I thought was the best overall except for Lashawn, who proved that a quiet queen is a boring one. Willam’s team was the reverse in that Jiggly was doing all the heavy lifting for a boring group of dolls. Chad’s team was evenly balanced and that’s why it won. Plus the teamwork between Chad and Madame was hilarious. That said, of the pairs, I probably would have given it to Latrice and Kenya as they were amazing in the ring together, but I can see why Chad and Madame got it.
- Speaking of Madame – Gorgeous! Let’s hear it for the big girls really truly bringing it this season.
- Speaking of Kenya – Show of Hands: Who gasped when she came on the runway?
- Princess’s outfit would have been better (and hotter) without the wig.
- Dida: You were serving fish on that runway. Dead, smelly, spoilt, busted fish.
- Sooooo using “Telenovela Realness” some point in conversation soon. Watch for it!
- Why did Willam look like a slutty Kristen Chennoweth after having a face lift? Not Good.
- Milan: What the hell were you doing on the runway? I understand when you have the hotness of Rick Fox and John Salley looking at you, you might get flustered, but bitch, Pull It Together!
- Speaking of the hotness of Rick Fox and John Salley: Cheers to both of them for not only being really fun straight guys but also for really getting into the judging and also giving pretty spot on critiques. And speaking of spot on critiques…
- BILLY B IS BACK Y’ALL! Even Michelle Visage’s questionable tastes seem to come together when he’s around. And you know when Lady Gaga’s makeup man is clocking your face, you better pay the fuck attention.
- <rant> How in the name of all that is sacred can you have two queens do a lip synch to Donna Summer’s “Bad Girls” and it’s BORING?!? I’m sorry Princess but you should have gone home too for that. </rant>
- Farewell Lashawn! You’re a baby queen and you have a long time ahead of you to grow into your fabulousness.
And now, let’s take a moment to discuss Miss Jiggly. First off, I do like the kid and I think she has what it takes. And I Howled when she was referred to as a “plus sized Jujubee” in the ring (and looked frighteningly like a plus-sized Jujubee on the runway). But the thing with Miss Jiggly is this: any queen can talk smack and throw shade for days (witness Miss Juju’s EPIC reading session in season 2), but there are two things that Jiggly needs to learn: 1) When you’re throwing shade, style and wit matters, and 2) more importantly, you better have the skills to back it up. Jujubee always got away with her shadiness because she was entertaining and can deliver (to this day, many people consider her the best lip synch-er in the show’s history). Which leads me to the little gang up on Jiggly in the Interior Illusions Lounge. Every queen there could see the insecurities that she was papering over with her tough girl veneer but unlike usual reading sessions this one actually seemed like it was trying to reach out to her and help her. And props once again to Latrice for telling it like it is. (On a side note for those who do not do drag: When one drag queen refers to another drag queen by their boy name when both are still in face, Shit Is Going To Get Real!) I hope Jiggly took what the other girls were saying to heart.
Finally, we return to THE DRAG RACE SCOREBOARD! Here’s how it’s going to it for this round since we have to adapt it for team challenges: 1 point for the winners of the mini challenge, 4 points for the winners of the main challenge, 3 for their teammates, 2 points for those that survived the critique without comment from Ru, 1 for those that got commented on, 0 for the bottom 3, -1 for the “Shante! You stay!”, and -2 for the sashay away.
This round’s scores:
Here we go…
- Chad Michaels: 5 (one for the mini-challenge, 4 for the main challenge win)
- Dida Ritz: 0 (she was up for the lip synch for your life)
- Jiggly Caliente: 1 (she got called out by Ru)
- Kenya Michaels: 2
- Lashauwn Beyond: -2 (sashayed away!)
- Latrice Royale: 2
- Madame LaQueer: (4 for the main challenge win)
- Milan: 3 (winning team)
- Phi Phi O’Hara: 3 (bonus point for the mini-challenge)
- Sharon Needles: 3 (winning team)
- The Princess: -1
- Willam: 2 (one for the mini-challenge, 1 for surviving Ru’s critique)
- Alisa Summers: -2
- Chad Michaels: 6
- Dida Ritz: 1
- Jiggly Caliente: 1
- Kenya Michaels: 2
- Lashauwn Beyond: 1
- Latrice Royale: 3
- Madame LaQueer: 5
- Milan: 4
- Phi Phi O’Hara: 4
- Sharon Needles: 7
- The Princess: 1
- Willam: 2
OBSERVATIONS – Still too early to call but Sharon Needles and Chad Michaels have emerged as front-runners due to their wins but there is no clear breakaway leader yet. Time will tell and we still have the rest of the season to get through.